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Burger King’s Angry Whopper

Posted by bronzechains on January 11, 2009

For starters, I have to say that I simply don’t know what to think about the name of this sandwich.  I’m torn between “This is the stupidest name for a sandwich.  EVER.”  and “Holy shit, what a hilariously brilliant name for a sandwich!”.  I passed Burger King on the way to my parents’ house for dinner the other day, and did a double-take when I saw the words “ANGRY WHOPPER” on the Burger King sign.   I’ve never been an avid fan of the Whopper, but I’m a sucker for a gimmick burger.  I’m also a sucker for anything that claims to be uber-spicy.  When the last Indiana Jones movie was in theaters, BK had something called the “Indy Whopper” to promote the movie.  And guess what?  I bought one.  Guess what else?  It was tasty.

Needless to say, I got my hands on an Angry Whopper today.  I couldn’t resist it.  I mean, just look at the thing.

angrywhopper

Let’s dissect this titan of fat and calories, without actually going into the fat and calories.  If you’re eating a Whopper, you know damn well what you’re getting into.  In addition to the standard huge beef patty, bun, tomato, lettuce, and mayo, this gutbuster includes spicy crispy onions, bacon, pepperjack cheese, pickled jalapeno slices, and “Angry sauce”.  I’ll be honest, the King had me at “hello” with this thing.  I mean, I was ready for one pissed-off sandwich.

Of course, my sandwich looked nothing like the picture above, which would have you believe that the burger had to be incarcerated due to it’s violent tendencies.  But do they ever look like the picture?  No.  I don’t expect them to; I know better.  Despite the flatter and sloppier appearance of my burger, it was pretty delicious.  The Angry sauce was excellent, and I want to have a jar of it in the fridge to slather on everything I eat from now on.  It was kind of like spicy barbecuey mustardy sauce.  I would be eternally grateful if someone found out where I could get my hands on a container of that stuff.  The standard Whopper components were as good as can be expected.  The pepperjack cheese wasn’t spicy at all, which was disappointing.  Pepperjack is supposed to be hot, and this was completely devoid of any heat.  The “spicy” crispy onions tasted exactly like the ones on their Steakhouse burger.  No spicy there, either.  Aside from the Angry sauce, the only kick in this package comes from the jalapeno slices.  I had previously read an online review of the Angry Whopper that complained about BK skimping on the jalapenos, so I ordered extra on my sandwich.  The result was what I would consider a normal amount of jalapeno slices.  My two friends who joined in the taste test, who did not ask for extra jalapenos, received only two or three slices on their burgers.  Disappointing.  Knock that shit off, Burger King.  Don’t skimp on one of the major selling points of the burger.  That’s just crap, and I don’t appreciate it.

The overall spiciness of this burger was a bit disappointing for a hothead like myself, but I understand that when something is being marketed to the masses, the manufacturer has to cater to the masses.  The average customer, even though they know the burger is advertised as spicy, isn’t going to want an extreme amount of heat.  I don’t think I’ve ever found a fast food product that was truly spicy even when advertised as such.  I’m somewhat in the minority on this, so I won’t complain too much about the lack of heat.

The Angry sauce was definitely the highlight of this sandwich, and I’m giving it an overall thumbs-up.  I won’t say that I’ll be buying this burger again though, because I can’t bear the thought of eating a Whopper all that often.  I think a regular Whopper has a full day’s worth of fat in it, so I try to keep my distance most of the time.  Rest assured though, I will more than likely try the next gimmick Whopper that the King comes up with.  My prediction:  A Whopper with a fried egg on top, with french toast slices in place of a bun.  And pancake syrup.  Ick.

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